her: so what do you want me to tell her?
me: say she's gone to 'netherfield' in search of 'a single man in possession of a good fortune (who's in want of a wife)' as a husband. anyway we're meeting on monday right
me: i really want some seaweed chicken now i can't seem to control my salivary glands
her: quit trying to avoid her who is residing in the 'lucas lodge' will you?
i am bad with dates if you say it's a monday "i dare say (it) is" & have a heart for your own poor nerves oily food is detrimental to your health, mrs bennet
conversation with denise at 3+pm
me: have not my nerves been great companion to you?
her: too unworthy of my acquaintance
me: 'are you rejecting me? well then, 'forgive me, for taking up so much of your time' *cues shattering sounds of darcy's fragile heart*
her: 'i dare say (i) am'. your society at longbourn is unworthy of my acquaintance, if i must
me: oh! your disposition is regarded highly unfavourable, mrs dercy, but i will say nothing more & make my absence felt in longbourn. goodbye, i'm off to find ma h0miez 冰李
her: he, that amiable & i must say, highly favourable young man is not of your society, don't you dare mrs bennet, you old widow! your acquaintance i must keep no more
me: why, it is such a misfortune that a young lady like you should be so displeasurable to be acquainted with. 'i could more easily forgive your [his] vanity had you [he] not wounded mine'! yes, i will make my leave now, a carriage is on its way - i will not have to get my ankles & petticoat soaked in dirt & appear half as wild as you!
(attaining gratification by 'adapting' p&p in our conversations)
gratuitous dedication of p&p tumblr gifs to d (not darcy). you're welcome
laughed when i watched this, laughed when i read this
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