there once was

1
winter is gone but you are back with blue stained lips & raw red cheeks. your hair feel as cold as your wintry white-washed bones knitted within your skin

2
you sit staring into the disarray of your mind, pain brewing from the inside out, saying, my mind is a tangled web of incoherent words i cannot explain to you

3
i cannot keep from looking at my fingers & toes & the floor but i think i caught a glimpse of your vacant eyes finely rimmed red from dried up tears gently tugging at you every time you blink

4
that's alright, i said, i'll spin pinwheels of dandelions for you

5
i see you let out a smile but i know that you are undoing the knots that hold the spaces within us together

6
your bones are neatly stacked in a corner like books soon to be discarded

7
you slip a note under my fingers while i lay still with eyes shut, playing a game of pretense of escaping the moon & its stars

8
i continue pretending to be a dream away from reality when actually i am waiting to hear the door of your room click before i sit up to read your letter to me

9
i hear the strained shuffles of nervous feet, quick moves blanketed with secrecy, the click of a door–only it is the click of the main door. it sounds like the beginning of every ending in every aspect of my comprehension & being

10
i don't need to know what you wrote
you are already out of the door
our door